It’s been a while since I wrote, and last time I was feeling fed up because I just couldn’t get back into things. I knew I needed something to help me move forwards, but I hadn’t found it. In the end it’s been a combination of things that has made me feel more positive.
I did the journaling course, and it was just what I needed to ease myself into things, decorating my notebooks with colour and getting inspiration for a few new ways to journal. I listened to the wisdom of others – a few people I follow or chat to on social media wrote about similar feelings, and pointed out that it’s the time of year, the greyness of winter, the desire to hibernate. And they were right – as time moved on eventually things became clearer.
So I’ve taken some action.
I’ve signed up for a six month mentoring and group coaching programme, which I am very excited about. I know I have all the pieces there from my explorations over the last 14 (!) years, and I feel like now is the time to finish working out how they all fit together. This feels like my natural next step, it just felt like the right way to get the coaching, help, accountability and community that I have been looking for.
I’ve decided to channel my creative energies into a new mini project. I have a million photos of the sea, and I’ve started sorting through them to pick out my favourites. I’m going to print some out on canvasses and as A4 prints to display in my house. I’m going to write some descriptions to go with them. And I’m going to post one a day on social media and share some seaside views with those who need to see them. I have other ideas floating around as the next stage of this, but to start with I’m going to get the sea photos out into the world.
My freelance work is what it is. I sense that my ongoing project is changing as we go into a new phase of the work we’re doing for the client, and that’s fine. It’ll probably mean less of my time spent there, and this evolution does come with mixed feelings. Pleased that I will be able to honour my need to move on over the coming months, but sad that in doing so I may lose touch with someone at the end of that time.
I was reading back over these posts earlier to see whether they’d be helpful to share with the two people running the programme I’m joining, and I was grateful that I’ve created this space for myself. I’m not saying anything controversial or secret on here, but unlike other blogs I’ve created I’ve chosen not to share this one with anyone I know. So I suspect that nobody reads these posts. Blogging doesn’t seem to be the same as it was when I first started writing 10 years ago – I don’t think many of the people that ‘like’ blog posts actually read them, for example. I do make an occasional connection like this but not as many as I once did.
But that’s fine with me – I have this space to write, and I can share it if I choose to. And in writing for an external audience (ie not my own journal), I have to explain bits of me to put things into context. In doing so I think this helps me take a step back and get an overview of my thoughts. So I’ll carry on popping in here every now and then to comment on how I’m getting on with things, as I work out where I’m going to go at my next crossroads……..